A deep depression, within me, has set in since the return of I'm a Celebrity on ITV last Sunday. With little midweek football action on the horizon, at this time of year, and with 'Norris Cole' shop duties from early Sunday morning through to Thursday teatime, I feel like I'm glued to my armchair on my return to Chez Palms.
A staggering 9 million (Herberts) viewers tuned into I'm a Celeb last Sunday evening, whilst I listened to the wireless (radio) with my headphones on, as I researched the next dozen or so historical pubs I'll be visiting in London town before Christmas.
Ms Moon chuckles at Ant 'n Dec's tiring, repetitive, monotonous 'gags' that are met with forced laughter from the camera crew and production team. It has to be the biggest jolly up since the Conservative Party's 'on the House' piss ups during the COVID lockdowns in 2020. Roll on Christmas when repeats of 18 series totalling 372 episodes of Heartbeat return to our screens. Comedy duo Claude Greengrass and 'Daft David' do make me laugh.
'Barthez' messaged me from the sunny climbs of Tenerife, speaking favourably of a recent episode from the Undr the Cosh podcast, that featured former Lincoln City, Wycombe and QPR legendary player and manager Gareth Ainsworth. I was completely besotted with 'Wild Thing' when he arrived at Sincil Bank from Preston for £20k, in 1995, where he was reunited with his mentor John Beck. His Beck stories on the podcast are laugh out loud, and include a tale of Ainsworth returning to the dressing room, after a pre match warm up, to find Beck under arrest by HM Customs and Excise officers following alleged tax evasion on imported whisky from Poland.
I missed one of Lincoln's (and Ainsworth's) greatest nights on September 11th 1995. It was my wedding anniversary. Manchester City arrived at Sincil for the first leg of a League Cup tie. 'Wild Thing' turned 'em inside out as the Imps obliterated Citeh 4-1 - we even won the second leg 1-0 at Maine Road. 5-1 on aggregate. Not bad, eh?
On Tuesday evening, a couple of hours are whiled away with Faggsy, in the cosy, warm back room of the King William IV, in Sneinton, half a mile away from Nottingham city centre. The 'King Billy' is a Victorian gem and real ale heaven. We enjoy beers from Shiny and Black Iris breweries.
I finally get a day off on Friday. I lounge around in the morning doing some admin. I pay off the water bill and take meter readings for the gas and electric. The credit we've built up will pay for flights to Tenerife in March, where I'll be taking in a few games on the island.
I alight the 27 NCT bus at King Street terminus at 5.30 pm. The Market Square is alive with Christmas stalls and fairground rides. A big wheel towers above the Council House. I wander along Long Row away from 'Winter Wonderland.' I order up a pint of Harvest Pale ale from the Castle Rock stable at The Dragon pub - a new entry in the 2025 Good Beer Guide. I sit on a bar stool awaiting the arrival of the members of the Keyworth Dream League, resurrected 2024.
In 1993 my mate Ackers and I formed a fantasy football league - the brand name, 'Dream League' was formed from stats obtained from Baseball and American Football games re-player performance. Pre internet I built a database of 700 players (Prem to Div 3) and their 5 year goalscoring records. We then held an auction in the top room of The Griffin pub, in Plumtree, where each fantasy manager was allocated a $100 budget to build a team, with the formation of 2-3-5 plus a goalkeeper. We kept this going for a decade before parental duties took priority. The unique selling point of our league is, for example, Mo Salah can only be owned by one manager. It's basically goals scored, minus what your 'keeper concedes.
The lads file in one by one - some hadn't seen one another for years when we held the auction back in August, in the function room at the Plough, in Normanton on the Wolds. The only absentees are folk who are in Australia, Cayman Islands, Tenerife and Peterborough or have a prior engagement. We enjoy a banquet at Laguna curry house on Mount Street, as the beers (Kingfisher) continue to flow. I arrive home in the early hours after bundling a worse-for-wear 'Sticky jnr' into a taxi just off Friar Lane.
The inevitable happens the following morning - Carlton Town's home game is OFF against North Ferriby. I preempted this the previous day. I fancied Lincoln City v Wycombe Wanderers, but was put off by the wintry forecast (Storm Bert). Who in their right mind would put their lives on the line on an East Midlands Train?
Notts County have a 12.30 kick off versus Newport County. I have a bad feeling about the scoreline as the Pies have struggled for goals at Meadow Lane this season. They are also missing the creativity of crowd-pleasers Jodi Jones and Dan Crowley.
I call in at a convenience store at the bottom of Sneinton, at the Southwell Road bus stop, across the road from the Fox and Grapes pub. The front door window has shattered glass. There's a notice on the shop door stating that customers are not to wear hoods when entering the shop - 'Norris Cole' won't be applying for a job here anytime soon.
Fuelled with an Oasis drink, Lion chocolate bar and a pack of mints, I make the short walk down London Road. It's £25 to sit in the Derek Pavis Stand. The DJ set includes: The Kinks, The Dandy Warhols and Editors. It usually does to be honest. Why not change your Set mate?
I saw Newport blow away Notts 4-1 under Neal Ardley's leadership back in 2019 . I also recall a visit to their Rodney Parade ground in 2018 with blog legend Trumpy Bolton. We had a few drinks in Usk and Newport town centre before watching a 1-1 draw versus Coventry City in a storm that wreaked more havoc than Bert.
Notts' formation is (3-4-2-1) It's a patient, possession based system. Only McGoldrick plays with any risk, The visitors don't look interested, one iota. Their 6' 9" forward, Kyle Hudlin, rolls around on the floor and beats the rain-soaked surface like a small child having a tantrum.
At half-time I chat to the guy next to me as the bloke on the public address system reads out a string of notices and announcements during another dull episode of 'Crossbar Challenge.' Notts just can't blow the Newport County house down in the second half. They total 27 shots, of which 21 are on target. They are dealt with brilliantly by the 'keeper or blocked by players throwing their body on the line. I'm gutted that it ends 0-0, but I called it before the game.
I dry out in the armchair as I watch the final scores coming in. I miss a five goal thriller at Lincoln where Nottingham-born Tendai Darwika has bagged a brace for the Imps. I'm back in town for 7 pm. I share a couple of drinks with Tony Mac at Cock and Hoop on High Pavement.
Manchester synth-pop band W H Lung are playing at The Bodega this evening. They are named after their local Chinese supermarket. It's practically a sellout as we squeeze through the crowd to take our position to the rear of the venue.
They play a set of just over an hour. Their music reminds me of OMD and China Crisis - Tony Mac throws in early Depeche Mode. They're okay, but nothing to write home about. Tony Mac posts on social media "Not all Brazilians are great at football, ditto Mancunian bands."
I manage a quick chat, at the gig, with Carlton Town DJ Alan Murphy, who once again is in the mix. He's seen a couple of goals scored today by Carlton Town loanee, 18 year old David Olatomide, who is learning his trade at Step 6 Stapleford Town. At least somebody has seen the onion bag bulge today.
Attendance: 9,408 - (306 visiting supporters)
Man of the Match: Nick Townsend, Newport 'keeper.
Thanks to James (long time blog reader) who popped into the shop to say hello.
U Pies, James