It's Tuesday teatime and I'm hanging around at the bottom of Westdale Lane East, in Gedling, outside the Royal Kebabs takeaway house - it's a tad early for one of them. I've just demolished a chippy tea at The Plaice. The bloke who dished up was proper grumpy. He best cheer up for fish 'n chip reviewer Danny Bhoy, when he tips up on his next spot check.
'Chief Wiggum' arrives at bang on six bells. Club Shop Ken and Herr Harlow are waiting in the village of Burton Joyce. We sail through Newark-on-Trent as we zip up the A46 towards the cathedral city of Lincoln - for once Sincil Bank is not the final destination.
There is a massive Carlton Town connection and gathering at Lincoln United's Ashby Avenue this evening. Former Millers cult hero Jack Steggles is in the nets, whilst a number of Eastwood players have played at El Stadio Stokeld, including the joint managers. We have a quick chat with Carl, who is Jack's dad, and a lovely bloke.
After a light refreshment in the clubhouse I pay £9 on the gate and part with a few quid for some raffle tickets and a go on the golden goal. I won a tin of out of date biscuits here a few years ago. The Taxman and I often used to chuckle about that.
I browse at the Eastwood CFC line up. An astonishing, jaw-dropping 47 different players have donned a Badgers shirt this season. This comfortably surpasses any previous records held by Barry Fry when managing Barnet or Birmingham City circa 1990s. It would also explain why they have only won two games in the last 15 outings. A measly 13 pts chalked up from a possible 45 pts available, sees them requiring snookers to reach the play offs, when only two months ago it looked a formality.
Hopes were high at the beginning of the season, as was the budget. The last few post match interviews, with the gravel-voiced Carl from Badger TV, (he should audition for a Guy Ritchie film) has painted a picture of Stan Laurel head scratching and Brian Blessed beard-stroking from the management team, as they mull over another disappointing outcome. Key players have left. A promising, aggressive, committed centre half is one of them, after being called out on Carl TV, He'll push on and play at a higher level than Step 5.
Eastwood's players put a shift in for the first 45 minutes. 40 year old Aaron O’Connor is psyched out from the penalty spot by Steggs, who stands his ground and gives him the eyes. OC's stop start run up sees his spot kick smash into an advertising hoarding instead of the back of the onion bag.
They deservedly take the lead on 55 minutes through the on loan Eratt-Thompson. But their joy is short-lived when McMenemy evens things up after some schoolboy defending. Robertson looks to have earned the Badgers three deserved points. The goal of the game from Park, after a flowing move down the right, sees Lincoln steal a point. They’ll have to improve on Saturday when Deal Town from Kent rock up for an FA Vase quarter final clash.
I somehow manage to visit Trent Bridge Cricket ground twice in the space of a few hours on Wednesday. I renewed my season ticket for the summer and bought some nice Adidas clobber from the club shop. Within a few hours I'm walking back down to the ground with Faggsy for a Notts Cricket Lovers' Society speakers' evening.
Five Live journalist and presenter Eleanor Oldroyd is tonight's guest speaker. She is staying with relatives in West Bridgford, before driving up to Media City on Salford Quays, where she will present the weekend breakfast show on Saturday morning. The BBC studios, in the north, have been christened by Radcliffe and Maconie as the Piazza de Stan Ogden, named after the layabout, chain-smoking, beer-supping slob from Coronation Street.
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Oldroyd describes her tough journey in journalism, as a female in a male-dominated industry. Fleet Street and TV closed any doors on her that were slightly ajar. It was BBC Radio Shropshire where she made her breakthrough. Later she moved onto Radio 1's Newsbeat team before joining Radio 5, which was later to become Five Live. She became the first woman to present Sports Report in 1995. Eleanor has also covered for the BBC the funerals and marriages of the Royal Family. I ask her what her favourite venues are. "Trent Bridge, Lord's and Adelaide", she replies, with an interesting anecdote to match each ground.
I have a lazy one on Thursday. I view the final episode of the excellent Channel 4 documentary: 'The Miners' Strike.' It's another tough watch. In 1984 over 73% of Nottinghamshire miners voted against strike action. Citing intimidation by Yorkshire flying pickets, and a flouting of the constitution, with no national ballot held by NUM President Arthur Scargill. The courts ordered that all the assets of the Union be seized. Thatcher's advisor, David Hart, played a major part in the break up of the strike. He was her eyes and ears on the frontline. Nonetheless, it was a very sad, tearjerking moment, when the mineworkers' returned to work, after a poverty-stricken and anxious year, without income.
It's Friday morning and I'm sat in Bear, a coffee house in Hockley, whose story began in the Staffordshire town of Uttoxeter. I've been tipped the wink by ex work son Tommy T that they do a mighty fine full English. He ain't wrong folks, as Mac and I mop up what's thrown at us.
We catch an early train to South Yorkshire, stopping off at Sheffield, where no excuse is needed for a quick jar in the taproom on the station platform. The next port of call is not far up the line. Rotherham has a population of 100,000. Labour hold a slender 3,000 majority with only 57% of the constituency bothering to vote. 13% more rocked up to vote LEAVE in the BREXIT vote with a 67% majority.
Famous people to come from Rotherham include: Lynne Perrie (Ivy Tilsley), the Chuckle Brothers, Jive Bunny, Paul McShane, Howard Webb and David Seaman. I'm in charge of today's itinerary, so anything could happen.
We stand on top of the railway bridge taking in the breathtaking view of a viaduct to our left and the forgotten Millmoor football ground to our right, with it's old school floodlights that tower above the town. After a wander up to the new ground we walk back into town to tick off pub number one, New York Tavern. The theme for the day will be Chantry Brewing, whose ales are scrumptious and to die for.
Across the road is the Cutlers Arms, it's a Grade II listed building and a CAMRA heritage pub. It dates back to 1825 and was rebuilt by Stones Brewery in 1807. It was saved from demolition in 2004. I love the Art Noveaux architecture and green tiles.
We head up, after, to the town of Mexborough, where the real Brian Blessed is from, as is former Formula One world champion, Mike Hawthorn. The two breweries we visit double up as music halls. So not only does the beer flow, but bands play too.. Tony Mac is mortified to see Nottingham St Ann's cheeky chappies, The Chase, are topping the bill later in the month. He had a strop at one of their gigs at Beat the Streets a few weeks ago,
It's Saturday morning and I'm knocking up a bacon and Stilton sandwich as I prepare a slow cooker Chinese chicken curry for this evening. The clouds clear and the sun peeps out as I make the 30 minute walk down to Stadio El Stokio. I grab the final can of Castle Rock citra craft ale. I catch up with Casually Dan who has it all on playing a DJ set whilst doubling up as Director of the Millers' Creche.
I stand with Smiffy who is doing some opposition scouting for Belper Town. Carlton are still rubbing sleep from their eyes when they get caught cold and concede an early goal. It should be two after another faux pas, but 'Felix the Cat' comes to the rescue. Playing with a stiff breeze at their backs the Millers gain momentum without troubling the Stockton stopper. Jebbison fails to get a shot off despite being one on one with the 'keeper.
I check on the half time scores. Lincoln are on my mind, as in City and United. I've piled on the Imps as they are in a rich vein of form. United have their big day out with up to 1,000 attendees expected.
Khyle Sargent scores a beauty to peg back the League leaders. The Millers can only hang on for a few minutes. A cross from the left hangs in the air like a pitching wedge shot on the 18th at St Andrew's. A big 'un, who plays in the heart of their defence, nods a looping header into an empty net.
Attendance: 136 and 155
Star Player(s) Eleanor Oldroyd and 'Felix the Cat'
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